yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
Randomize
