Dude, hurry and get over. I need a wingman. She is on her 6th vodka shot and her resident ugly friend is still sober
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
Randomize
