So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
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