Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
I love you.
Bad choice
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
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