Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
Pappa wants mamma naked
i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
Randomize
