We're facebook friends in real life
OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
Randomize
