ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
Randomize