Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
He said "send me a motivational picture" so I sent one with mayo on my face that said "clearly I'm no stranger to white stuff on my face"...I'm the fuckingng worst
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
