Just toasted a glass of brandy with my own reflection to my dimples. Why are you not here?
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
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