Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
Hows this for an invention: a toilet that weighs your poop
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
All I remember is talking the cops into calling us a cab instead of giving us PIs while trying to wake up your passed-out-on-a-bench ass.
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
Randomize
