Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
I just got really nervous and swallowed all of my birth control
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
Randomize
