therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
Randomize
