How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
Also a shrinking boner emoji would be helpful
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
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