her vagine was all disorganized.
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
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