You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
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