I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
On valentines day I took a girl on a date that I suspect was homeless
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
I DONT HAVE A FUCKING JOB RIGHT NOW. DO YOU THINK I HAVE TIME TO WASTE GOING BACK AND FORTH WITH SOMEONE WHOS LYING, ABOUT LYING, AND JUST BEING A LIAR? HONESTLY, YES I DO HAVE TIME. BUT I HAVE A FUCKING LOT BETTER THINGS I COULD BE WASTING MY TIME DOING. LIKE ORGANIZING MY POKEMON CARD COLLECTION.
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
Randomize
