You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
Randomize
