If you die in college, do you die in real life?
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
The nurse who basically saved my life just came into the store. Didn't recognize her. Awwwwkward.
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
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