I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
"Being an adult" and "being happy" are two circles that do not overlap in my Venn diagram of life.
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
Let's say we can see the evolution of our "relation" by his name in my phone. Pizza slice emoticone. Pizza guy. Jordan. Jo. Jackhammer Pizza Guy. Jockhammer pizza guy.
Randomize
