I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
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