thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
A dude just looked at me like my drunk swaying was corrupting his progeny DUDE YOUR KID HAS A MULLET YOU'VE ALREADY RUINED HIM
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
