FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
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