How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
Randomize
