she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
Did you like my voicemail? Sounded like I was being murdered, right?
By a pack of ravenous dildos
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
Randomize
