I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
Sometimes I think I'm witty and funny, and then I realize it 3pm and I'm drunk
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
I knocked over his glass and he yelled "Oh no the boxed wine!" and slurped it off the coffee table. Then he showed me how to mix maple syrup, Jameson, and coffee. My family is better than your family.
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
Randomize
