wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
Best thing I ever did was get a dog. She's like a living trip alarm to warn me of visitors while I'm masturbating.
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
Randomize
