Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
i hope kanye doesn't show up to patrick swayze's funeral. " i'll let you get back to your funeral in a minute...but michael jackson had the best death of the year. just sayinnn ".
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
I think people are normalizing furries
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
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