Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
Quick, to the slutcave!
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
Note to self: make sure the door is locked before the handcuffs go on.
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
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