I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
I am 95% sure I just heard my cat say "What are you doing home? It's Saturday night."
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
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