"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
A university police officer just hhigh fived me when i drunkenly stumbled into Aderhold. Fucking 5 o'clock somewhere.ITS IN CASABLANCA RIGHT NOW! TIME ZONES!
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
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