The first thing on our $10,000 damage bill was "condoms in the main drain"
Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
no you cant smoke seaweed
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize
