sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
Holy sore nipples Batman
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
Oh my god, are you sexting me while watching the Democratic debate.
100%
Now I'll never know if it was me that got you worked up, or Bernie Sanders' social policies.
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
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