You know your life is awesome when sometimes you walk down the street eating a sandwich and you run into someone you had a threesome with. And not say hi.
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
