so that wasnt chicken after all
i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
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