Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
Truelife: I made out with my ex-boyfriend's girlfriend this weekend. Thank you Captain Morgan...
Was she wearing cherry chapstick??
No. Life's not always a fairytale.....
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
Randomize
