why are there goldfish crackers all over my bed?
you decided you wanted to name them & keep them as pets.
Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
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