How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
My CPA just snapchatted me a picture of her playing beer pong at a picnic. Time to do my own taxes?
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
Randomize
