I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
He wanted to watch a Charlie Brown thanksgiving. But I was like, fuck that, I'm a grown up. So we watched jumanji and I sucked his dick.
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
Sex in the backyard? Check.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
