Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
I just spent the last two hours on the phone with Emily trying to explain to her how to finger herself.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
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