It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
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