I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
I wish i was in the wii world.
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
If you had a good reason for throwing the toaster at the wall, now's a good time to tell someone. My parents are on their way back and you know my dad and his pop tarts.
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