Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
I just found little boats floating in my bathtub....they are made out of white castle boxes, condoms, pickles, and corks. All the wine we bought is being used as the "ocean"....clearly we didn't drink any of the wine.....but I don't remember doing this.
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
You looked up at me and said "I'm getting a mattress made out of this SHIT. Goodbye certa hellllllllo concrete!" then you started counting sheep
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
We got really stoned and then we fucked. Then he made me a panini.
Oooh, he sounds pretty classy
Actually, not at all. We were stoned so he made me a peanut butter panini. With a Rollo in the middle of it. And he left the panini press on all night. I could have died.
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
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