I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
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