You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
Randomize