where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
Im at target. Idk why I'm buying condoms AND a tutu for my cat. No one who dresses their cat up has ever gotten laid.
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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