super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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