last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
Part of me was thinking I should go old school and get a chasity belt before the semester starts. Really lock that shit down. But then I thought, fuck that. I'm going to hit that campus like an f5 whorenado
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
Randomize
