Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
Randomize
