Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
I'm about to punish you for sending me a Snapchat of your boyfriend's morning wood
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
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