just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
